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Small rocks build great walls.

I was appreciating The Great Wall of China. This wall was built to protect the borders of the empire. It has 21,196 kilometers of large, and it is considered as World Heritage Site by UNESCO.

When we see close the wall, we can appreciate that small rocks built this enormous building. The accumulation of this pieces of rocks made something marvelous.

In marriage, it is the same. Small acts can build strong marriages.

There are some small actions that strengthen a marriage like a smile or yield in a discussion and allow to the spouse to have the reason.

In chapter 6 of Gottman’s book. The author teaches about the importance of let your partner influence you. This is a small, but a powerful act to build a solid and strong relationship. I am single, so, I don’t have experience with “let your partner influence you” in marriage, but I had the experience as a full time missionary.

During my time, as missionary, I had a companion with less time in the mission, and who was learning “slowly” how to be a leader, or that was what I was thinking, and I was not taking seriously his counsels. With time, I noted that we were every time less close each other, and I asked him what was happening. He started to cry, then he said me that I was not taking in count their ideas.

After this event, I started to take in count his ideas, and I give him the opportunity of lead and take decisions about our work. Quickly, we started to be closer each other, and we improve our work, and we reach our goals.

Another small think that make a huge difference in the marriage is faith. But, why faith affect marriage? An unchangeable aspect of marriage is the need of face adversities like illness, financial troubles, parenting, etc. When a marriage has not a base of faith, these difficulties could look like impossible of overcome, and could generate a lack of compromise or desire to overcome.

Another small thing (or big) is temple ordinances. As a member of the LDS church, I am glad to know that marriage is forever, thanks to temple ordinances, we can seal to our spouse by eternity.

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